Does it ever occur that you talk to yourself in a way you'd never let anyone else talk to you? I fancy myself to be a generally kind and genuinely caring person, but not in reference to myself. Take for example, this class I've been taking. I think I'm the dumbest person in there. I make the stupidest mistakes. I flub up. I fluster. Meanwhile, the teacher is literally shouting, "JUST BE YOURSELF." And I keep thinking, "Yes, but how can I make myself more interesting?" And then I think of how much I'm spending on aforementioned class and whip myself into more of a frenzy. "JESUS CHRIST BE MORE INTERESTING, LOOSE-POCKETS MCBORING!"
Which is why I love my car. She's my buddy. I spend more time with her than anyone else. If I have nothing else in this town, I have Tawanda Jane. I try to take care of her, but I know I'm not great at it. I feel safe with her. She doesn't judge me. She doesn't think I'm interesting or care. She's a car. So far I haven't damaged her too much, although I worry she'll rebel against me one day and I'll have to call Car Talk, the Click and Clack Brothers, and get their opinion on my feisty and broken Toyota Matrix. And they'll laugh at me, and make fun of my name.
Minus One Point LP McBoring.
Plus One Tawanda J.
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